Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Trains, Planes, and Automobiles


It has come to my attention that over the past week I have traveled from New York City to Boston to London to Newcastle. The endless hours of transport seem a petty price to pay for the adventures I have embarked upon. I have taken public buses, trains, taxis, and two planes in such a short span of time. My favorite activity upon returning to England is to reminisce about the subtle cultural differences between here and the U.S. Because, as Tom’s mom says, “You do not speak English.” I won’t even get into the spelling discrepancies (as you can see I am using U.S. spelling for my blog). For starters, Lay’s chips have become Walker’s crisps. I have been anxious while on the road because we drive on the opposite side. I realize I need to become accustomed to people asking, “You all right?” because, in America, we simply ask, “How are you?” to which people inevitably reply, “I’m all right.” When British people ask an American, “You all right?” it almost implies that something seems wrong. This backwards language takes some getting used to. People up north do not say “me,” they say “us,” such as, “Let us call you back in five minutes.” Who the hell else was on the phone with me? Last I checked I was speaking to one person! However, one will say, “I bumped me head,” rather than using a possessive “my.”
The London Underground railway system is SUPERB in comparison to New York City’s grimy subway. The train cars in England contain plush, cushioned seats, with a friendly Brit reminding you to “mind the gap” when stepping onto the train from the platform. The NYC trains have dirty, hard seats, and you can hardly ride two stops without encountering a crazy person lecturing about the state of our society to nobody in particular. Basically, even bums on the street appear better in England simply because of their accent, which is much more pleasant on the ear than the harsh, grating R’s we drop in American conversation. I will continue to observe and report back on these unique citizens of the UK.       

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